“It was difficult, I felt alone” : Hame

Hame*, a 17-year-old high school student from Phnom Penh, Cambodia, went through depression after a cyber attack. She later found strength by seeking help.

A challenging childhood

Hame grew up in an environment where she was not very close to her family. Her parents worked abroad, and she was brought up by her aunt.

“My family is not close with each other. Sometimes we can see each other and talk with each other but not like other family who see each other everyday”, she said.

These experiences shaped Hame’s personality, making her socially reclusive. Combined with other challenges in her childhood that remain confidential, Hame was emotionally vulnerable.

When her computer and phone were hacked

Her vulnerability was further exposed when her computer and phone were hacked. She was extremely affected. Spending time online was her source of knowledge, her comfort in times of stress. The attack made her feel scared, alone and violated. This led her into depression.

“At that time, I didn’t want to talk with anyone because I thought I couldn’t share my problems with them”, she said about the cyber hack that took place when she passed grade 11. “I forgot how to feel; it’s hard to feel. It was difficult, I felt alone, that there was no one to rely on and to trust.”

There were times when she would see strange images popping up on her screen. This frightened her. Her circumstance placed her at severe risk of online sexual exploitation. 

Seeking help

Hame’s teacher observed that she had become withdrawn and looked pale. Her grades had also dropped. Concerned, she sought help from AusCam Freedom Project, a partner of Terre des Hommes Netherlands. 

At Auscam, she went through a vulnerability assessment test and was referred to a clinical therapist.

“She taught me how to control my feelings and my thinking, how can I get better, how to breathe,” said Hame, referring to her sessions with the clinical therapist.

Hame gradually began gaining confidence, officially reported her problem to her school and got a new laptop. She also created a new email ID.

“I see myself that I am a different person; now I can say that I have improved and I connect with people. I have a good relationship with my family unlike before”, she said. “I can think more positively.”

Message to children

Hame believes that children need to be very careful about their online use, and if they face any trouble, they should report it immediately without fear.

“I want to share to children my age that don’t believe people, no need to share any personal information. Don’t trust anyone”, she said. “If you got struggle, no need to be shy, don’t be scared, ask for help.”

Hame’s experience has motivated her to want to become a digital media designer and create safer online spaces for children.

She has also discovered that singing helps relieve her stress. She looks up to her favourite artist, Cambodian singer Aok Sokunkanha.

*name changed to protect identity